Eliminate Wedding Speech Jitters

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By: Jayelle Finch

You've just been asked to make a wedding toast at a special friend's wedding. It's a wonderful honor to be asked but you have never paid attention to what people actually say during wedding speeches. You also are more afraid of public speaking than rattlesnakes, earthquakes and broccoli soup with quiche combined.
What did catch you by surprise when he told you about his wedding plans was that he wants you to make a wedding toast at the reception, one of your duties as his best man.
You feel honored to be asked but also so far out of your comfort zone that you can't even picture your old security blankie! But you're a take-charge kind of guy who always steps up to the mark. Where do you start when making a wedding toast?
Learn from these suggestions on how to make an excellent wedding toast.
* It's important to get started early when planning, writing, practicing delivery and everything else involved in making a wedding speech. Don't be tempted to "play it by ear". Trust me, the results wouldn't be pretty. Hit the books for research and the web for tips too.
* Face the fear and use it. It's only energy after all! When making a wedding toast, it can be very valuable to have extra energy at hand that you can use to captivate your audience and make your wedding toast memorable. A speech without the energy of performance anxiety is lacklustre and totally lacking in passion.
* Just as a Pulitzer novel doesn't just fly off the screen onto the best- seller list, accept that you will need to write and rewrite your wedding toast. Leave some time between writing and looking at it again. You will be surprised at how you will spot things you need to change. You will know when you have it just the way you want it.
* Use humor gently. Don't use off-color remarks, or embarrassing stories that are better told at a stag than at a reception where people of all ages and backgrounds will hear your wedding toast.
* Talk about your relationship with the groom, a youthful adventure or two, about how you just knew he had met his intended when you were first introduced. In your wedding toast, say what a wonderful guy he is, how you think his bride is a great match and how great a future you believe they have together. Speak from your heart.
* Be brief. Three to five minutes is long enough for a wedding toast.
* Mirror, mirror, who is the best prepared of all? Run through your wedding speech, gestures and all in front of a full-length mirror. Use a stopwatch.
* Testing, one, two. If at all possible, find a few minutes before the reception starts to stand at the mike where you will be giving your wedding speech. Get a feel for the room from this point of view. Practice delivering to the audience, using eye contact with a few friendly faces or if looking directly at people makes you nervous, aim slightly over their heads.
* Raise a glass. This is the actual toast of the wedding toast. Make eye contact with the bride and groom when you toast them. Lift your arm from the shoulder, toast with a full glass. This takes place at the very end of your wedding speech.
* Hug the groom and the bride at the conclusion of your wedding toast and then take your seat. Job well done!